Could I eat these bars every day? Absolutely. Which is why the two times I’ve made them, I’ve gotten them out of my house immediately. First time, I took them to a girls potluck night, then to a Super Bowl party. And so far, they were loved by all females involved. And my husband chowed down on them too! But the females appreciated them more. Why do women appreciate dessert more than men? Not all women. My sister-in-law could care less about desserts. Which is why I hate her sometimes. Ok, only 0.5% of the time. Oh guess what?! My favorite spot in town, Just Be Kitchen, made these bars for their restaurant so if you’re in the Denver area anytime soon, you can pick one up there! How rad is that!?
As I type this, it’s 6:30 in the morning and I’m sitting in Snooze waiting for my best friend to get here. Since we are both so damn busy all the time now and no longer live with each other, we try to meet up every Thursday for coffee or breakfast to catch up while we work. As I get older, that seems to be the only way to hang out – to multitask. I keep watching all the episodes of New Girl and it reminds me of the days I lived with my girlfriends and all we worried about was if we would get a text back from the guys we liked. Well luckily now we don’t have to play that bullsh*t game. My husband is forced to text me back because I’m the one who cooks him dinner.
Speaking of husband, I’m in a bit of a dilemma. A relationship dilemma. Decorating. My husband doesn’t say much about decorating because it’s not like he would ever go to a store or go online to figure out home decor on his own. So I do it instead. And at the moment, I’m feeling the urge to redecorate our bedroom. Someone once told me you’re suppose to redecorate every 2-3 years to keep it fresh and we are almost at the 3 year mark and I’m feeling that urge. And I want to get our guest bedroom actually feeling like a comfortable space to stay. Which is why I want to take our current bedroom setup and put it in the basement. So I found all the new bedding, bed side tables, and lamps to go in our bedroom…then made the mistake of showing my husband before purchasing. He doesn’t like the bedding. But he’s not going to spend hours on Overstock looking for the right color bedding and the best thread count or when things go on sale. That’s not going to happen. But I already did that. And I like the bedding. So what do I did? Spend more hours looking for bedding he won’t like? Or do I just purchase it because he doesn’t actually care that much? Marriage dilemmas right here. But if our biggest dilemma is the bedding I want, I think our marriage is doing ok.
I’m on this big redecorating kick. At the moment, I’m redoing my office. Then pantry. Then bedroom. Then guest bedroom. Maybe it’s because my taxes are done. As a small business owner, I like getting all that done ASAP so I hand over everything to my account once January hits so I can feel like I have a fresh start to the New Year. Do you think schools will ever implement classes on money management or taxes? Because all I really learned in school was algebraic equations and was how to write a check and I NEVER WRITE CHECKS ANYMORE. Or do math. I have app for that. I remember the first year I started PaleOMG and my mom asked how much I saved since I was going to owe the government. And I quickly asked, “Why would I owe the government? I’ve always gotten money back.” I literally had no clue about how taxes worked (and still don’t to some degree). My school system failed my in many ways. I mean, I write for a living and I still don’t fully understand grammar or punctuation. But I do understand that the faster I get my taxes done, the quicker I can organize a pantry. And an organized pantry with labels is one of the most satisfying feelings ever. Ughhhhhh I can’t wait.
But enough about taxes and hell, LET’S EAT ALMOND JOY BARS!
For the crust
- 1 1/2 cups almond flour
- 1/4 cup + 1 tablespoon coconut flour
- 1/4 cup + 1 tablespoon tapioca flour
- 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
- 1/4 cup melted ghee or coconut oil
- 1/4 cup maple syrup
- pinch of salt
For the coconut layer
- 2 cups unsweetened shredded coconut
- 1/3 cup melted coconut oil
- 1/3 cup honey
- 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
For the chocolate layer
- 2 cups mini chocolate chips
- 16 almonds (or more depending on how many squares you’d like to make)
- Preheat oven to 325 degrees F. Grease an 8×8 glass baking dish and line with parchment paper (this will help with removal to cut the squares later). Add all ingredients for the crust into a food processor and pulse until completely combine. The dough should mix into a slight ball once combined. Put dough in a pan and use your fingers to press dough around evenly throughout the pan. Poke holes with a fork in the dough to keep it from rising in the oven. Bake crust for 20 minutes, until golden brown. Remove then let crust cool.
- Place all the ingredients for the coconut layer in a food processor and pulse until coconut becomes fine and completely combined. Spread coconut layer on top of crust and spread evenly throughout. Place in freezer for 5 minutes.
- Melt chocolate in a double boiler or microwave. Pour melted chocolate over coconut layer and use a spoon to smooth throughout. Place the almonds throughout the chocolate layer then place in the freezer for 10 minutes to harden the chocolate.
- Once hardened, bring to room temperature before cutting into squares then serve up. They are definitely better at room temperature when the chocolate has softened up a bit!
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